Fluorescent Light Zone: Flounder

(A simple typo in a work email regarding booking a conference room called the Fish Bowl, because of its glass walls, becomes an object of despair for an unwitting working stiff — in the Fluorescent Light Zone.)

To: N. _ _ _ _ _
From: D. _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Date: xx/xx/16
RE: Conference Room Request

Hi N.,
Please book the Fish Bowel from noon to two tomorrow. We’ll have lunch served there too . . . .

(N. forwarded the flub to a co-worker friend for a one-minute giggle and the friend responded.)

To: N. _ _ _ _ _
From: A. _ _ _ _ _ _ _

That’s pretty shitty.


As part of the Company’s Email Security Policy, random checks were being performed that day and the messages above were read by the IT Security Officer, who then had the HR Officer read them. In turn, the HR Officer showed it to D. _ _ _ _ , the requester of said conference room. D. was reprimanded because the error generated an unprofessional exchange that included a swear word. The powers that be had a brief meeting and concluded that such swear word is a gateway to more caustic swear words. As a result, D. was suspended from work for two days without pay and given the arduous project of writing 100 times with pen on paper the name of the conference room spelled correctly.

Moral: Do not flounder or you’ll be filleted and cooked like the proverbial fish jumping from the frying pan into the fire, as can only be experienced in the Fluorescent Light Zone.

Image: Pixabay

Image: Pixabay

10 thoughts on “Fluorescent Light Zone: Flounder

  1. I sense there’s something soundly evil in the four-letter substitute for feces, but it’s vague at this point in my moral development… concrete operational.

    When I was a child, my mother taught us the expression, “number two.” To this day it’s an ugly pair of words – worse than the anti-euphemism in question here. The word that costs hard wages at the hands of IT Nazis anal probers.

    Yet people say “number two” endlessly in a variety of inappropriate circumstances. I cringe, but I can’t send anyone home without pay. Unfair!

    I’m calling shenanigans.

    Years ago, I had a strict fundamentalist Christian friend who grew up on a farm where the only word he’d ever heard for feces was shit. He was a big boy when he learned the true poo-poo taboo the rest of us knew.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It’s funny, when you create euphemism for a word then over time that euphemism becomes just as unsavory because we’ve associated it with the word being “softened” and the fact that it’s become a substitute. It has all the attributes and intent of the so-called bad word so why would it be any better? Just because it doesn’t have the same jarring intonation I think. It’s the combination of short or clipped vowel and hard consonant sound and usually one-syllable word. Does that make some sense?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Sure does. I wonder if enlightened worlds send people home without pay for using complex, multi-syllable substitutes – like sucralose and aspartame. I’ve heard people use the word “sugar” when they really meant the other s-word. Either way they’ve avoided calories, I guess.


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