Hadley’s heinous hiney halted hairy hooligans.
Butt Out, Bad Guys
Hadley’s heinous hiney halted hairy hooligans.
slice of life
Leave
I couldn’t believe
He told me to leave;
This nice gnome
From his cozy home.
Me, his roommate
Since 2008.
Why the boot?
I’m just an old coot?
My space is a hole
Not even much for a vole
I’m a plain pushover,
I only eat your leftover.
I will admit
For longer than a bit,
I’ve been filling up your studio
I never thought I’d outgrow
But why couldn’t you be a diplomat,
And not simply call me a FAT RAT?
Out of Control
Image: Pixabay
He banged her up bad
She’s almost six feet under
He climbs out the ditch
Sobered up quickly
He misses her suddenly
She made him feel good
Remorse sets in him
He yells up to the heavens,
“I loved my Corvette.”
End Game
Image: Pixabay
“What this messed up world needs is to be new-cleared.”
“Just because everything seems to be going to hell doesn’t mean we deserve to be nuked.”
“We’re all nothing more than just pawns of the elite greedy liars we call leaders.”
“Still doesn’t mean we have to throw in the towel.”
“Look, I’m hungry, so let’s just end the game.”
The two old men clear the chess board and head out to get their daily lunch special.
The City Kid’s Guide to a Nirvana Hike (a six-word story)
Image by Anna
Be one with nature ‘n sh*t.
The Laundromat
Space is tight inside Lu’s Launderette. Stacey finds herself standing shoulder-to-shoulder with a man about her age. They’re both folding their shirts, pants, shorts, and undergarments. She starts feeling self-conscious as she knows it’s not her imagination that he’s been surreptitiously eyeing her lace-trimmed thongs and silk teddies. Her face reddens when he catches her eyes.
He smiles and says, “I don’t mean to be rude, but I’m wondering where you buy your underthongs.”
Stacey suppresses a laugh as she’s never heard such a term before, though they sound just as accurate as panties. She clears her throat to quell the urge to giggle and replies, “At Madam Madison a couple of blocks from here, actually.”
“Excellent. That’ll be my next stop, then. Hey, men wear those crotch covers too. Check this out.” He shows her a pair of black nylon thongs. “They’re comfortable, and as you know, they dry quickly.”
For a minute, Stacey doesn’t know how to respond. Then, she thinks, why not. She remembers her father wearing Speedos, why not thongs indeed?
“By the way, that’s a nice looking bra. Are those from the same place too?”
My father had man boobs, but he didn’t wear a bra, Stacey thinks. She hurriedly stuffs her last articles of clothing into a duffel bag and leaves without an answer.
Spam Lookalike
Freddy is excited about lunch because he gets to try Spam for the first time. His mom told him she would serve it sometime this week and it is the end of the week, so he thinks today must be the day. He runs downstairs toward the dining room. As usual, he doesn’t wear his eyeglasses because they’re uncomfortable. But his myopic vision discerns a plate sitting on the dining table, which isn’t set but they’re an informal family. The closer he gets to the table, the better he is able to make out a pinkish, rectangular shaped piece of meat in the plate. Eagerly, he picks it up and bites down, but the texture is rubbery and the taste isn’t anything he’s ever had before.
“Dumbo!” Freddy turns around to the sound of his sister’s laughing.
“You’re eating my phone case. I left it there to soak in baking soda to get the stains off. Now, you put your teeth marks on it.” His sister charges over to him and grabs her case from his hands.
“Next time, wear your glasses, so you can see what you’re doing,” she says, as she walks away with her phone case and a faint smile.
Moving
Hidden in closets
Now revealed for what they are
They’re just taking space.
The Fiend
Image: Pixabay
In a neighborhood not far from the city lives an elusive creature that few suspect is not human. Origin unknown and equally mysterious in how it sustains itself, the creature is looking outside, hiding behind the folds of the stained drapes that pepper the air with dust when moved even in the slightest way. The creature sees skipping down the sidewalk a little boy, who pauses in front of its house and picks up a pebble. The creature stays still. It rasps what sounds like “fiend” when the boy throws the small rock toward the creature’s shelter.
A Bridge No More
Image by Blogetta
A chance meeting at an acquaintance’s party led to them becoming significant to each other. The words “I love you” had been exchanged. Just as Alison thought their relationship was going to be more than a flash romance, Brian blindsided her by breaking up at a time when she needed someone most. Alison wept until she felt empty and numb.
After three months, she still felt melancholy so she called him. “I miss you. I miss our walks along the bridge. Our weekends together. Please come over. I need to talk to you.”
“What took so long for you to call? I missed you too,” Brian admitted. He went to see her. They talked into the night, sleeping platonically with each other. As she began to doze off, Alison couldn’t help but feel they weren’t so compatible after all.
The next day Alison felt resolved and accepted the breakup. They parted ways amicably. Weeks later, Brian started texting Alison, making overtures to meet with her again. At first, Alison felt upset for she thought she had put things to rest, but he managed to engage her. They communicated almost daily via their smartphones. A reconciliation appeared to be in the making.
One night, a slightly intoxicated Alison called Brian to pick her up from a party. Upon reaching her apartment, her tongue gave way to a stream of words that produced tears from both of them. Phrases such as “This will never work” were tossed several times at a decibel level meant to cause pain. Suddenly, Alison collapsed in bed, partially from exhaustion and partially from alcohol she had consumed earlier at the party.
Once more they bade each other farewell. This time it looked to be final.
Karina Pinella 
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