He plucked out her eyeballs.
She was too sleepy to see the guy with the spoon.
He mused he would give her the moon,
Do something funny, just like a looney ‘toon,
Now he feels like a goon.
Because of her scream,
He can’t be fulfilling her dream
As he realized she was being figurative
When she said, “Pluck my eyeballs,
For I find you unattractive.”
I have an extra ligament,
An extra pair of eyes,
Even an extra ear.
Secretly created in a basement,
I woke up on a bed of ice.
I had no choice to be here.
It took me a moment,
But I came to realize
That I might be something to fear.
Image: Pixabay
Pay, pay, through the nose,
Quickly down the drain,
Crazily, crazily, crazily, crazily,
Life is ‘bout just payin’.
16 years ago today in September
An evil, senseless, heartless act
Changed many lives forever.
Alas, it was not the beginning
Nor close to the end, it just keeps spreading;
The endless taking of human life,
There is no reason.
Prance with arrogance, respect becomes a speck.
Get ye thee to SlasherMonster Magazine, a mean scene of wackiness and streaks of raciness. Relax for a change; shed your worries and share some funnies.
Here’s a sample of my silliness:
Mr. Whyner
That mister
Is such a whyner.“Why you do dis?”
“Why you do dat?”
“Why you . . .”Enough already!
With my Weedwacker,
I whack off the head of Mr. Whyner.Silence is golden,
My glass bong I be holdin’.For hours I smoke my wacky weed;
I hear a voice – Why am I a bad seed?
Some days are serious and call for decorum. Well, that ain’t happening at SMM this weekend, so go right ahead and throw all that classiness out the window—it’s time to get wacky and maybe a tad obnoxious, too! Pour out all the goofiness from your pores…let it soak into the cyber pages of SlasherMonsterMagazine.
Do you have a wacky poem to share? Perhaps a loony limerick you want to rap? Don’t be shy! Come on over to our house, baby, and let it rrrrrrrip.
Whoa! Things are going to get a little wacky—participate in the SMM event and you’ll have a chance to win a wacky magnet. Let’s face it…you’re crazed, amazed and dazed. Is your refrigerator looking a little too normal? Don’t worry! Ryn’s wacky magnets are full of unique character, just like you!
Give a warm welcome to our ghoulish host, Karina Pinella, who also happens to be insane………
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They jibbered,
They jabbered,
Their words bitter,
Worse than spoiled batter,
Carelessly strewn like leftovers and litter,
Equally bad, both the former and latter.
They push too far their scare and dare,
The situation getting too dire,
Evoking fear
Of who will spark the first fire.
Image: Pixabay
Touch not your fellow co-workers,
Serve well both internal and external stakeholders.
Shred all confidential information,
Lock your computer when going to the john.
Stifle your yawn at meetings,
Imbibe lightly during business gatherings,
Be discreet if you must ask,
“Has anyone seen my flask?”
Maintain a paper-free environment and don’t be dour,
Avoid socializing and merriment until after hours.
Be polite when you ask,
“May I please go home when I finish this task?”
Proudly she waves
Against clear skies and fields
Good ‘ole red, white, and blue
So much history in earning our liberty.
Happy 4th of July, America – Independence Day!
Image: Pixabay
Hot head, short fuse,
Sorry for the abuse.
Forgive the heel to butt,
I just treat you like my mutt.
Cushy bed, hot meal.
Make amends, begin to heal.
Now do me till I squeal,
That’ll seal the deal.
Lucille . . . ?
Image: Pixabay
Their chemistry was right
At least at first sight,
For months they were tight
Then came the big fight.
Both their hearts took a bite
From each other they took flight,
Then after nearly a fortnight
They agreed to reunite.
But things don’t always crystallize
They soon realize,
When there’s no more to analyze,
Or a desire to compromise.
Karina Pinella 
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