Mike steps outside of his glass-walled office to retrieve his report from the printer, which is located across from his enclosure. As he heads back to his door, he glances to the right and sees Lindsay, his office crush, talking to one of the new Account Managers. He becomes jealous, gets distracted and crashes into the transparent doorway. He staggers back, dazed. When he opens his eyes, he sees his crush and the new guy staring at him, seeming concerned.
Image: Pixabay
“Barney!” Betsy screams, paralyzed by the sight of the eight-legged creature that appears to peer at her from the bathroom corner.
Betsy’s husband, Barney, runs inside the bathroom, where his wife is naked and dripping from getting out of the shower.
“I’m too afraid to get my towel. That thing is too close. Help!” Betsy screeches while rubbing her arms.
Barney is still eyeing Betsy. As a newlywed, he’s still in awe of how lucky he is to be married to such a voluptuous beauty. He quickly forgets why he was summoned. He strides over to Betsy, picks her up, and beds her down.
Caught off guard, but pleasantly so, Betsy too forgets about the spider, as they romp around the bed. As she closes into the moment of no return, her eyes flutter open and catch the dangling spider from the ceiling. She screams as if there is no tomorrow.
[Inspired by Lynn Thaler’s blog: Random Life Thoughts: Morning Visitor]
Image: Pixabay
Strolling down the street,
Looking dapper and well fed,
Smug with no cares,
You have food and a warm bed.
No hassle, no bill collectors.
Being a pampered cat can’t be beat.
Image: Pixabay
A Series of Ludicrously Bad Hair Days, Day 1
[Poetry in collusion with a short story]
Haironymous Bush reads the plaque on the door. Inside are people of varied sizes, ages, and sexual persuasions with one thing in common and nothing more. Their bad hair days outnumber the good. They all stand in attention as their Chapter Hairmeister, Maddie O’Hare, leads the opening prayer, “Dear Lord, help us overcome our frizzies, split ends, and turmoil over our tresses. Bless us with a calmer mood.”
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Image: Pixabay
Always up at dawn
Ninety-hour work week pace
Fast heart attack track.
Image: Pixabay
Mrs. Chilewitz is simmering inside as her only son, Donald, relates to her his college crisis.
“Professor Linden said I cheated, Ma, but I didn’t. I’m telling you this not so you can talk to anyone because it’s a done deal. This isn’t a store where the customer is always right. It’s school where the teacher is always the right one.”
“How dare he accuse you. What evidence do they have?”
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Yo, bro’, what went wrong?
We guzzled down beers,
Shot eight balls on the green,
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Image: Pixabay
Pete has mixed feelings as he listens to Joe about Rose. At one time, Pete thought she was the one who would end his self-imposed celibacy. It was a close call, but now he’s glad he waited. Ironically, it was the waiting that ruined their relationship, but in many ways saved him after he found out more about her.
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Image: Pixabay
Mary Jo rushes to the airport’s public restroom. She has less than five minutes to greet Drew Hanson in the meeting lounge. He is one of her company’s bigger accounts and she has been sent to give him their preliminary report. As a habit drilled into her as a child, she quickly lines the seat with toilet tissue. She sits and relieves herself. After washing her hands, she dashes out, unaware of the toilet paper trailing behind her like a bride going down the aisle. Her face is ablaze with enthusiasm as she eagerly goes forth to make a good impression in her first client meeting.
The Makings of a Legendary Salad in Six Days
Day 1: Growing the greenest, lushest greens in a greenhouse
Day 2: Picking the greenest, lushest greens and washing them
Day 3: Packing the greenest, lushest greens into plastic containers
Day 4: Transporting the greenest, lushest greens to the supermarket
Day 5: Buying the greenest, lushest greens and putting them in a serving bowl
Day 6: Pouring your (store-bought) Caesar Salad dressing on the greenest, lushest greens in the serving bowl
Image: Pixabay
Karina Pinella 
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