The Tattooed Tree

Naked and trembling, Trevor stops to catch his breath. Already he feels the curse cast upon him. The tattoos on his stiffening torso become more pronounced, resembling wall-sized etchings.

His arms shoot upward, branching outward, simultaneously dividing into limbs of various density. Immobile, his legs fuse together, while his feet extend out all around him. His toes multiply, scattering and digging deep below the earth at the same time.

Moisture penetrates throughout his whole being, or whatever self-awareness is left. The last thought as he can describe it as such is that he wishes, out of all the tattoos he has, he had avoided the heart with Her name carved on it. He didn’t know she would take it to heart and act as if she owned him.

Royal Vexation


Image: Pixabay

Princess Beulah blows her top when she learns her royal crush, Prince Roland, celebrated his birthday without inviting her. She unfriended him from her Facebook and dropped him from her Snapchat. Taking out her bejeweled diary, she writes:

He’s just another minion,
A bunion to excise,
An onion not worth crying over.

No longer my major attraction,
I shall speak to my father,
And ask him to make way in his dungeon.

Watch out, Rolly, old flame,
Soon your head will fall
And permanently adorn my wall.