Bro’, You Heavy

My bro’ is stew, or in the sewers. I am sorry for what I did, but I was tired.

Bub, my bro’, weighed a ton. For breakfast, he would eat six bowls of Honey Monster Puffs, five fried eggs, four strawberry Pop-Tarts, three buttered waffles, two thick slabs of bacon, and a partridge in a pear tree. I exaggerate. He did not eat the tree. I will not bother writing the rest of what he would eat during the rest of the day; it will just make my journal look like a grocery list. And remind me how close to broke I was getting because food is not getting cheaper. It is a good thing I get to take home some leftovers from Hog Heaven, where I wash dishes and bus tables. I also get a 10% discount at the Food Mart, where I stock the shelves three days a week.
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The Face

Fancy Pants Andy they call him behind his back. He wears suits designed by the likes of Hugo Boss and Calvin Klein. He sits behind the Cherry polished wood reception desk that is set low, as the slate gray wall behind him prominently displays the occupants: Georges, Mason, Twissler & Krane, LLP, Attorneys-at-Law. The much sought after services of the firm’s Ivy League of attorneys make Andy’s job challenging meeting and greeting clients. But on this particular day, more than the usual amount of litigious clients have been coming in. Continue reading